All day yesterday I kept thinking in my mind there is something I was supposed to do by October 1st. That day came and went, but I still didn’t make the connection until this morning.

I had asked all the reviewers involved with Props & Pans to write something about breast cancer on their own websites and link to the DVD’s For The Cure giveaway we were holding by October 1st. Well, I’m a day late obviously.

At first I felt guilty for forgetting. I initiated this as a way to educate others about the disease I know all too well. My cousin, Stephanie, died in April 2005 of Inflammatory Breast Cancer - a rare and aggressive cancer that many of you have been educated on by Toddler Planet.

Although I forgot what I was supposed to do, that day didn’t come and go without remembering Stephanie, as rarely a day goes by that something doesn’t remind me of her spirit, her laugh or her smile. I ate lunch with her good friend Evie, who happens to work next to my building now. During our lunch we spoke about several memories and good times, and it was nice to connect with her again because we share a person close to both our hearts.

By the time I got back to work the nagging was in my head again of what was it I have forgotten to do and obviously didn’t write down. As I opened my desk drawer I found a newspaper clipping staring at me. I had saved it from our local paper a few weeks ago to remind me to send a card to a woman pictured on the front.

The lady in the picture, Tammy, was at the Race for the Cure in a wheelchair, with no hair and a cane - obviously still in the throws of ongoing treatment. She and Stephanie had connected being the only one’s in our area with IBC. They confided in each other and provided support that only someone going through the same hell as you can. Tammy is still fighting, but the newspaper labeled her as a survivor.

Already on the verge of tears after lunch I thought about how all the pink the world can’t save those who have already been taken by breast cancer. In many ways I want to be angry at events like Race for the Cure for making such a public display and creating false hope for those like Tammy who aren’t surviving, they are fighting and will be fighting until the disease overtakes them. Chemo and radiation can kill the bad cells, but never the memories or the emotions of what someone goes through.

But then I realized that just like Tammy and Stephanie connected on this single thing they had in common, many other women find strength and hope in being with others who have been down paths similar to theirs. If an event is what keeps their spirits high, then who am I as someone who’s not faced this difficult journey to criticize it?